PERKY HOST DOES NOT GET FIRE
Will Hines - 917-721-1138 email@example.com
MADELINE is sitting at a microphone wearing headphones,
broadcasting a radio show.
And here's one more item, television fans! The CW has
announced it will release a DVD of its short-lived remake of "Melrose Place."
It may sport a more polished production than its
90s predecessor, but that polish hasn't rubbed away its delightfully campy
A PRODUCER sticks his head in speaking in a quiet tone.
Madeline, didn't you hear
me before? There is a terrific fire in this building. It is tearing through the
oak staircases like they are newspaper. We have to
leave. I am speaking quietly only because I am paralyzed with fear.
I'm going back to the window to wave for the fire
department to rescue us. Follow me, please.
PRODUCER leaves. MADELINE turns back to the microphone.
Say television fans, if you're troubled, here's a happy
thought! Remember that Retro-chic
nostalgia-fest Mad Men was snazzilly renewed for another season, meaning
we can look forward to 13 more gin-soaked dapperly dressed episodes, this time
in mid-60s swinging style!
Madeline, do you
understand the scope of this fire? Huge columns of flame are ravaging the
floors below us. Even through these concrete walls, you can hear the
crackling. You need to come with me to the
window and wave to the fire department. Do you understand?
Do you hear how quiet my voice is? I have never been this
scared in my entire life.
MADELINE nods. PRODUCER leaves. MADELINE turns back to the
Uh-oh TV fans, a bit of a downer of an item: efforts to bring
back quirk-riffic dramedy Pushing Daisies have finally stalled. Looks like
to look elsewhere for our careful concoctions of smiles, tears and whimsy!
in normal circumstances your tv gossip show is useless, do you understand that?
now, with the fire mercilessly gutting the foundations of this building -- your
show is even more useless. I looked down the stairwell
at the flames. They are awesome in scope. Can you
Do you understand that there is a terrific fire in this
And that your radio show is normally useless and now
MADELINE pauses, but does not nod.
I love my show.
You will die here, crazy pants. You will die here.
PRODUCER leaves. MADELINE returns to the microphone.
It's come to my attention that more fans than usual may be
missing this episode. Well, remember to catch it podcast form at
tvtalk.daytonradio.com. Coming up after the break -- thoughts on the goth-fused
love stories of True Blood, and whether it's the
romance of the decade or just a pain in the neck.